31 Mar 2015

Blossoming

It's a girl!
I thought it was about time to share with you, that we are having a little girl. I wanted to wait a little while, as it's nice to keep that secret between me, Dey and our close family. There was a point where my Mom didn't want us to find out and didn't want to know if we did, but she soon changed her mind. We already have her name, which I really am keeping a secret. I chose it a long time ago and I really do love it. It seems so much more special now that I can refer to bump as my daughter, it also makes my heart melt when Dey calls me and asks how his 'girls' are. It's amazing how much more of a bond you feel when you find out the sex, you stop referring to your bump as 'it'. But I can understand why so many people chose to keep it a surprise, it's still just as magical either way.

So many people thought and still think we are having a baby boy, so much so that I absolutely convinced myself that I was too. So when the radiographer told us it was a little girl I actually asked again. Having your 20 week scan is so much more than the gender reveal though, it's the most nerve racking and overwhelming experience. You have to patiently wait whilst they measure every precious organ and see if everything is forming correctly and that the baby is healthy. I am just so eternally grateful that she is fine and I can't wait to meet her now.

I will update you on how my second trimester is going soon, everything has completely changed since the first.

P.s my outfit here is completely head to toe Asos.


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Home?

I thought I’d write this post, as I have wanted to for a long time. Mainly to get your opinions or advice or if any of you have been through the same situation. Do you regret it or was it the best move you ever made? Me and Dey have wanted to move to America for a long time now, we’ve battled back and forth, changed our minds over and over again. But I think we are settled on making the big leap to the other side of the pond. Now that we are having a baby, it puts a new perspective on things. I’ll be taking a grandchild away from my parents, my brother’s and my family. But it also makes me want to move just that little bit more, see Birmingham will always be home. I just simply do not want to live here any more, I do not want to bring my children up here. 

Now I'm not saying that England isn't beautiful, good gosh, there are so many beautiful places here. But they come with a high price tag, getting on the property ladder here either comes with a heap of debt or you pay over the odds for a tiny house that you more than likely couldn't swing a cat in. Familiarity is always a draw though isn't it? You have your favourite restaurant, shopping centre, you know your way around, you have your friends, you know how much it is for a coffee at the Costa up the road. Home comforts, family, you don’t sound different to anybody else, you went to school here...you have memories. But nothing is stopping us making new memories, new friends, finding a new favourite restaurant. The main and most important thing you’ll miss, is your family. What if someone is taken ill? You miss birthday’s and Christmas and getting that hug you appreciate so much from your not so little brother. It’s such a huge decision, a huge gamble...but what if you regret making it so much, that you become bitter? That you resent people for keeping you here out of guilt. There are so many ‘what if’s’, what would you do? Would you take the leap and leave home, your own country? 


It’s not an easy thing to just get up and move to America, we are very lucky that Dey's brother made that leap of faith for love a long time ago now. He left England to be with his beautiful wife and he is so happy, his life is great. I mean he has a pool, the Summers are warm, it snows at Christmas. America just seems to hold so many opportunities, so much more for your money, the way of life for your children seems so much brighter. But will it ever be home?
This film from Hive really touched and surprised me, you'll have to watch it to know what I mean. It made me realise that if I don't take that leap of faith now, I may end up regretting it. It also reminded me of a certain Mother and Father-in-Law who hop on planes and travel all that way across the ocean to see their Son. Love is a bond that distance will never break and moving will never change that your heart will only ever have one home. Because that home will always be where your family are. 

If you are missing someone, or they would like to come home and don't particularly have the funds, I've teamed up with Hive and their #cominghome campaign to give you the chance to win a 'Coming Home' experience worth £1500. All you have to do is head here, to the Hive Facebook page and comment on the competition post with why someone you know deserves to win the experience. The competition closes on April 6th. It's a really lovely gesture and if I could enter to fly my brother-in-law home to meet our little baby in August...well that'd be priceless. Good Luck!! (T & C's)

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26 Mar 2015

It's just one of those days.

You know when it's sunny out and you could totally make the most of your day and you know like, go outside. But you simply don't have the energy and yeah it's pretty but: bed. Yeah, today is one of those days. Don't get me wrong, I am a positive person most of the time. But today, well today is just one of those days. I really don't want to entertain anyone and I simply don't have the time for everyone else's stress, but hey it's there you know. Why does it always come on that rare day off when you wanted to have a lie in and be a complete slob in your PJ's? You totally opened the windows, you're getting 'fresh air'. Then you log online and everyone is either in the Maldives or you decide to hop on Pinterest and everything is clean and white. Whilst you're just staring at an ironing pile the size of your wardrobe and three empty teacups you've left next to your bed.


Life isn't all Peonies and exotic destinations, sometimes life is sheets you should really change and hair you should really wash. But that life is just as good right? What being pregnant has taught me is, sometimes you just gotta live with your own stench...that and we all need to take some time to relax. I try and do so much, please people, be good at my job, be the perfect pregnant woman, be a great wife, be a great friend, be a great daughter, be a great blogger...it's bloody tiring. So today I ate two toasties in one sitting and I didn't feel bad about it at all. In fact it was pretty marvellous and now, well now I'm in bed at twenty to three in the afternoon. Who's going to stop me? I should really be cleaning my house or probably doing some sort of pregnancy yoga...meh. My unborn child will forgive me I hope. Quiet time is rare and it's only going to get more sacred when the baby comes along. It's not really that bad that I just can't be bothered to do anything of remembrance today. I don't know why I'm writing this, but I guess I've just noticed that a lot of my friends aren't taking time out for themselves either. You should girls! Stop trying to do everything and achieve it all in one day...just eat the Easter egg you bought for your brother, you can buy another one right? I honestly might just lie here for the rest of the day and imagine that all of the obstacles of mess surrounding me are things people would love to Instagram. Life isn't perfect is it? Pretending it is, now that's a full time job I would never get paid enough for. I'm off now to, you know carry on doing nothing. Bliss. 
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